Boys...and Girls

Let's face it. Boys don't talk much.


I read somewhere that when you plan to have a conversation with a boy, it's best to be doing something like shooting hoops, driving in the car, playing a game, etc. I also read that it's important for them to be emotionally connected to Mom and they will want and need to talk to Mom, but timing is critical.

They are likely to start talking about something when you least expect it. So you're supposed to be prepared for it at all times. When they do start talking about something important; stop everything, listen, and take advantage of the moment because you may not get it again.

Jack and I had such a moment the other day. Here's how it went.

Me: "Jack, I need you to look at me for a second and listen to what I'm saying..." (Jack puts down his book and makes eye contact.)

Jack: "Oh, I'm listening, Mom. I'm getting better at listening."

Me: "You are?"

Jack: "Yeah, my book says its really important to listen when you talk to girls."

Me: "Oh, really?"

Jack: "Yeah, it says you're supposed to ask a girl a question about herself and then really listen to what she says."

Me: "Which book is it?"

Jack: "The 'Dangerous' book in the bathroom." (I always put books in the bathroom that I want Jack to read...)

Jack: "But it says you have to be careful not to listen TOO much cuz what if the girl has been given the same advice and she's trying to listen to you? then you're both listening to each other...and nobody's talking...then you get an awkward silence and they're REALLY not good."

Me: "No, you're right, they aren't very good. I usually just ask someone another question about themselves if that happens. What other advice does it have about girls?"

Jack: "Oh, I don't know. Stuff."

And the moment was gone.

So yesterday when I was in the bathroom, I picked up the book to see what it says. I had no problem finding the page since it was the only one that was dog-eared. Here's what it says about girls....



Unfortunately, Jack knows about awkward silences. Last year Jack went to his first (and only) mixer. He spoke to one girl the entire night. It happened after 2 hours of not speaking to any girl. Finally, the one girl walked up to him and asked him his name. He answered, "Jack."

That's it.

Didn't elaborate, didn't ask her her name.

Nothing.

Trust me, he knows about awkward silences.